No Denying – It’s All About Psychology

It's All About PsychologyIt’s All About Psychology – Building Relationships Pt. IX

Remember: People care about themselves first, then anyone else who seems to care about them too. So when you do things for the people who are giving you their time (reading what you write), they learn to value what you say and do things to benefit you so that you feel like continuing to do things for them. It’s not about you at all. It’s all about psychology.

What usually gets you in trouble is the fact that you’re thinking about yourself and what you’re trying to accomplish. That keeps you from seeing the fact that if you want other people to give you what you want, you have to give them what they want first. And again, I repeat, it’s all about psychology.

…I’ve given you a lot of insight into my thought process when I approach a writing project but none of what I shared with you will help you at all if you can’t honestly answer this question…

Are you willing to put what you want to the side and focus on giving others what they want without thinking so much about how much you’re going to get paid from your efforts?

That’s a tricky question because even if you answer yes, that’s not enough. Saying what you’re willing to do and being willing to do what you say are two completely different things.

Your major competitors are seen as people who have products that are superior to just about anything you produce. Why? Because nearly all of them understand everything I’ve told you up to this point.

Respect the time other people are willing to share with you by giving them the best information you possibly can.

Forget about competition and that if you give away or sell some of your best information that it’s going to hurt you and your business. That’s crazy because most of the people you share your information with won’t do a damn thing with it. Out of every 100 people you could probably expect 5 people or less to go through all of it and put together a plan they will actually execute.

But here’s the thing…

For every 100 people who buy your products only a small percentage of them will do enough to compete with you on any level whatsoever. So, about 95 people out of the 100 who gave you their money won’t do anything at all to put a dent in your business.

People get addicted to stuff that makes them feel good because… – it’s all about psychology. When you produce quality information that’s geared towards actually helping people, many of them will get a wishful thinking high. What I mean by that is they’ll sit there with your materials and daydream about your information helping them to do something but they won’t actually put any of your information to good use (and, again) because… – it’s all about psychology.

Just having a great product in their possession is enough for them.

These types of people like to create ideal outcomes in their heads and scare themselves out of taking action because if they took action, they would be accountable/responsible for their own future.

I’m not sure where it comes from, but people love to blame others for their past, current and future states. People don’t take responsibility for their actions anymore. At least, they don’t want to. As long as that mind set exists, you can produce highly valuable products and sell them to a lot of people knowing that you are not creating a large number of competitors.

With that being said, there’s no reason for you to hold back the quality of anything you produce. Most people will say a lot of things but they aren’t willing to do a lot of the things they say. They talk about taking action on good information but they won’t.  Their inner mind set and belief system will stop them in their tracks, proving once again that it’s all about psychology.

So sell thousands of high quality products and count your money. Holding back on the quality of your information ultimately limits the number of repeat customers you’ll have and takes money out of your pockets so don’t hold back. Give people the mental high they want and deposit the money you get into your bank account.

You’re not responsible for anyone else’s success. If they don’t want to do what it takes to be successful, that’s completely on them, but do give them quality products that work if they work them.

Nobody likes rejection or criticism.

It absolutely terrifies most people and that’s why many of them will never get anywhere in business or in life. No matter what you do, you run the risk of being criticized or rejected by other people.

Every single time you create an article, newsletter, eCourse or report, you put yourself in a position for someone to criticize you. That one fact alone stops most people in their tracks before they can even start because everybody (on some level) wants to be accepted.

Not everyone is going to like what you put out there, so you need to come to terms with that right now and understand that you’re not alone. Even the gurus get a little nervous when they release something to the masses. You just have to be willing to push through that fear.

You’ll soon start to realize (as I did) that the majority of people will appreciate your efforts and look to encourage you on to bigger and better things. Forget the losers who have nothing better to do than to tear someone else down so they can feel taller.

Success comes to those who plan for it and are bold enough to go after it no matter who stands in their way. Plan for success – then boldly move forward with your plan, no matter what.

I write well, but I’m not the greatest writer in the world. At the same time, I don’t ask anyone for permission to write and be successful at it.

Don’t ask for permission to succeed and don’t worry about how people will react to your work. As long as you take the time to make sure you do your best, you have reason to be proud of yourself.

Everyone had to start somewhere, and the people who would criticize you the harshest only want to keep you down so you don’t ever develop the skills needed to compete with them. Ignore them and keep moving forward towards your goals.

Never let anyone take your accomplishments (big or small) away from you. Just keep moving forward.

Remember, the power of perception is a powerful tool. It’s your responsibility to use it wisely!

You’ve probably heard the saying… “You never get a second chance to make a good first impression” and it’s very true.

The first contact you have with someone is sometimes your only chance to get them to see you as you want to be seen so it’s critically important that you put some thought into that first contact.

What people believe is true is the truth as far as they’re concerned. It’s all about psychology and the more you realize that, the more you will achieve. That being the case, your job is to influence (right from the start) what people think the truth is.

Some of the people I’ve shared this view with say it’s unethical to try and make people believe something that isn’t necessarily true and I agree because that’s not what I’m asking you to do.

I’m asking you to actually have honest intentions with people and take measured steps to make them see those honest intentions where they would normally assume something bad. Never let people assume something about you. Let them know what you want them to know up front so it’s easier for them to let their guard down around you.

Just think about it.

How many promotional emails have you gotten this week about some new product? How many of those publishers routinely send you helpful information without trying to make a sales pitch?

Not many.

Whenever you see who some emails are from you automatically know it’s a sales pitch and your guard goes up. You aren’t likely to buy from that person when this happens. Here’s a small sample of what was in my email box the other day. The first and last ones arrived on the same day, from the same person, about13 hours apart (overkill). The three (3) in the middle came from the same person within minutes of each other (severe overkill). Needless to say, I took a pic of them, and deleted the emails – never to be read. I refuse to even entertain reading emails from people who send out so many in one day. Now, IMHO, had these two people done what I believe the correct thing should be, I would have received one from each of them and would have been willing to read them because they’ve shared valuable info in previous emails. In this case, neither of these people seem to know that it’s all about psychology.

That’s why I stress the need to send your readers more than a flood of affiliate links. That’s a big key to getting more people to buy from you right there. If you write a report about doing something specific and get people excited about it, they’ll want to buy a product that helps them do what you just got them excited about doing.

Anything you can do to distance yourself from competitors like that can only help you make more money. Your readers expect you to be like everyone else. Don’t be!

You have no excuse for continuing to do what you’ve always done and getting yourself lumped into a pile with the rest of your competitors. You know better. You know what steps to take. All that’s left is for you to make a decision right now to take action on them.

If you’ve been around for a while, you’ve likely heard this: “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”

Now while Psychology Today gives the ‘real’ definition of insanity, I certainly understand the merits of the new-age definition.

Again, I hope you’ve learned a lot over the last few days about running your own successful customer relations newsletter. Just keep in mind any techniques that you have learned. And remember to always put your readers and customers wants and needs first and your newsletter is sure to be successful and profitable. It’s all about psychology!

I really hope you’ve enjoyed this series on Building Relationships for the Long Term. I know that if you put what you’ve learned into practice and show your clients/subscribers that you care more about them than about your bottom line, you will succeed!

Wishing you all that you desire & deserve!


The brain is a tricky, fanciful thing, isn’t it? And I’m sorry that it’s so long, but there didn’t seem to be a place to cut it off and make it shorter… lol

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